I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
bring money and cleavage
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize