why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
