I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
