She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize