She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Can vaginas get frostbite?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
