Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize