Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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