idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
