ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Sponge bath it is.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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