I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
