Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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