if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
her vagine was all disorganized.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
