he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize