we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
