Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
