I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
