bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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