just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
