Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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