Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
false alarm. still invincible.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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