Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Your penis caused this!
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