If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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