THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
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