I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
