at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
