So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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