I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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