Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize
