Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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