Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
