i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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