so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
