At least make sure they are 18
Why
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize