just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
