Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
