but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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