If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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