Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
