Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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