at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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