At least make sure they are 18
Why
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
i dont even know how to be here
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
