she looked like the bat from fern gully.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
