Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
