Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
