Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
