Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
