i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
