If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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