Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
He's a Shit stain on my heart
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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