I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
